Runnin’ (Part 4) – In the Hallway, In the Bedroom

29Jan13

Beast and Beauty“How bout a tour, my love.  Welcome to your new home!” he pulls me off the floor, waves his hand in the air like a tour guide in a fancy top hat.

The living room is as just as sterile as the kitchen, beige and off-white throw pillows tossed against a cream linen couch.  A coffee table, thick with polish and free of dust, has magazines perfectly displayed like a Japanese fan, one, two, there, four, five.  The carpet is plush and pale.  I try to keep myself light, keep my feet from sinking into the pile, but  they are clunky and thick, the outlines of my toes and heels permanently imprinted in the carpet like the Hollywood Walk of Fame. The Runaway Walk of Shame.

The smell of Scotch Guard and glue is overpowering, a chemical fog that makes my stomach turn. Up the staircase we move, smooth walls smothered in different shades of yellow; butter-cream, daffodil, pale sunset, egg yolk, baby shampoo. i can see a younger version of Pat, a wild Tarzan wanna-be locked inside a yellow world where footsteps are seen and mistakes never erased.

Pat pulls me into his room.  We are time travelers.  From Yuppie 90s to sleazy and psychedelic 70s with just a turn of a knob, a push on a door, a small step from the Land of the Yellow into Teen Druggie Den.  Bookshelves with bongs.  Milk crates with records.  Speakers bigger than my television back home.  Fuzzy posters and a giant Iggy Pop cutout, shirtless and bloody, and though his eyes are cardboard they are wild and dangerous all the same, throwing tiny daggers when you walk by.  I’m not high, but I feel their gaze, their fixation.  I grow even colder than before.

His mattress is stripped and naked, tossed in the center of the room.  It looks so vulnerable and raw with tiny blue stripes running like lines on a map, crashing into beige metal buttons.  Even though I am inside, I cannot shake the road, everything is tied back to shiny metal signs that dictate direction, that hold so much promise and uncertainty.  I am standing still, and yet my body buzzes, feels the wind shoving me against the freeway’s shoulder when a mean semi rushes pass; a thousand tires spinning black and chrome in a wild blur that makes my head spin.

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14 Responses to “Runnin’ (Part 4) – In the Hallway, In the Bedroom”

  1. 1 pinklightsabre

    I like paragraph 4 best. Not just because I’m a Stooges fan, but for the the composition of it, how it starts and ends. All very visceral – good detail on the mattress, too (paragraph 5).

    • Thanks for the specific feedback. It’s helpful to see which parts connected with readers, resonated. Listening to “Hold Me” by the way! Forgot about that one……

  2. The visuals are really impressive – I see that living room, the mattress, the bongs – like a place I have been before – well done!

  3. i say this every time but I can’t get over how you paint a picture, like the footprint in the carpet, i remember that, and scary iggy pop, or the wind of the semi whistling menacingly past. you got skills, girl!!!

    • Wanna take a trip? I’d find some great ways of describing our adventure bipolaronfire. If only…..

      • I have the word ‘Roadtrippin” and “Spring” on my latest vision board….

      • What’s a vision board? Do I need one too?

      • Honey! What’s a vision board? WHAT’S A VISION BOARD???? Call Oprah!! Lennon Sundance don’t know what a vision board is??? Oh Lawdy we gon’ have a vision board day!! Hop the bus to Boulder! YES YOU NEED A VISION BOARD!! You better google it Missy!! It’s a board (poster board) with all your dreams & wishes on it! And you focus & focus on it & create your own magic!

      • Alright. I googled it. It’s kinda hippie. I’ll do it if it WORKS. (Shit, I hung a lemon over my stove to attract money, so why not right?)

      • It WORKS, Sister!!! And I AM a hippie and that works too 😛

      • Alrite… anything for a fellow, cool bipolar whose burning so bright. I’ll start collecting “items of desire.”

      • Ahhh you are so good to me!! Keep me posted dearie.

  4. This post made my head spin – in a good way!


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